Right now I’m struggling with the Blogpost That Refuses To Die. I had a good idea, and when I tugged at it an entire nest of entangled factoids fell out. It’s the backside of being an omnivore in knowledge with a thorough education; you can’t fire off something from the top of your head, without having it turned into an academic essay. This is a situation I know well; a good and seemingly easy idea evolves into a gargantuan work. I’ve put many of them down before I’ve completed the task. In the long run it’s crippling; I do a lot of work, but see no results since I abandon everything before completion. In the past this had a specific cause; being unemployed and permanently out of money put up a perpetual distraction:

”You should be looking for work instead.”

 

Now, when I finally have a work I can start working on my pace. Another crippling factor have been mine unability to calculate how fast I will finish. In general I choke on a project the moment I realise it takes longer to complete than I expected to. But the only way to get feel for how long it will take is to finish a lot of pieces – not just one or two – before I know my pace. The Blogpost That Refuses To Die is one in the pipeline of many projects. Unfortunately the habit of abandon projects when they drag has stuck, and become a demon of its own to fight. So I’m really up for two battles this time; not only am I wrestling a tangled nest of factoids, I’m shaking a tiny sliver of determination against a giant who’ve grown over twenty years, yelling

”DO YOU FEEL LUCKY?!”